Fake News

Not in my Calendar = NOT REAL

Breaking Report: Nurses at the infusion center warned Tough Twinkie that “Chemo Brain is real.” Sources confirm she believed them… sort of. In the same way people “believe” Mercury is in retrograde. Dismissively.

Early infusions showed only minor lapses of memory. After the final infusion, round 6, the condition escalated. Witnesses say entire appointments vanished from memory. “Um, my bad?” said Twinkie in a press release.

Experts have since confirmed: if it’s not written in the official calendar or backed by a blaring phone alarm, then the event does not, in fact, exist in this reality. 

The Tough Twinkie administration urges friends and family to proceed with caution and with paper trails. It is advised to hate the game (chemo) and not hate the player (Tough Twinkie).

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